Personal Reflections

As the semester is winding down, I found myself going through my previous blog entries. If it is possible to be nostalgic only a couple months after something happens, that´s what I was feeling. I also felt that none of my blog entries truly conveyed the message I wanted to share. Therefore, I think it is time to make an entry about my personal reflections during my semester here. I have learned a lot and don´t want to forget the valuable lessons I´ve been taught through my overwhelming number of experiences here. I want to carry this with me everywhere. So I apologize in advance for the long entry, and thanks to anyone who makes it all the way through.

I would first like to talk about how my mind has completely opened since I came here. It sounds cliche to say that, but I whole-heartedly believe that Granada, well Europe in general, has completely changed my perspective on life. One of the main ways I can see this change is in my attitude toward Islam and the Arab World. Granada is in Southern Spain, which basically means that Islamic influence and history is intertwined with the history of Spain. I have been taking classes here about the history of the Arab World, Islamic Art and Architecture and Mediterranean literature. As an American, I had an ignorant, but obvious negative view towards the religion of Islam and the Middle East. It was not until I was able to understand more about the culture and history that I could let those negative thoughts go. It is something so easy to forget; that ignorance is bliss. But in this case, I was pushed into remembering my ignorant point of view through education.

It was not only my classes that changed my way of thinking, but the complete immersion into a utterly different society. From the meal times to the perception of time to the value of resting, it was a tough change. I feel that being thrust into this situation could have either been disastrous or the best experience of my life, and I´m happy to say that I experienced the latter of the two options.

Secondly, I would like to talk about how traveling almost every weekend made me a calmer person. I think everyone knows that I am a naturally stressful person, and yes, from time to time, I like to be in control. But, I had to learn how to be more calm here. My first traveling experience was to Barcelona, and I was completely stressed about it. It was planned completely by us and I was very nervous about being in a new city with no idea how to get around. I tried to control every tiny aspect of the trip and eventually realized that it wasn´t worth the energy. I found that you can try your best to make things the way you want them, and if they don´t happen to turn out that way, everything will still be alright. This has proved to  be a valuable lesson in my other various trips, and I was able to enjoy my time much more as well.

My third reflection has to do with the friends I have made here. I truly did not think that I would meet people who would end up having such a huge impact on me. There is something to be said for being able to fully feel at home in a city that is not your own, and the only thing that really made this my home was my relationships with the people I have met. We each have a unique connection to each other, while all having the same, immense connection with each and every person in the program. We have gone through this huge changing period in our lives and everyone experience it all together. There is an unspoken understanding between my friends and I here and equally, the bond between us also goes without saying. No matter what I was going through here, I felt I had a community of support and not only that, but I completely and utterly love these people. We have had so many amazing times; laughing at stupid jokes, drinking tinto de verano, pretending to do work at cafes, burning cals with pals and traveling all over Europe. When I think back to these memories in the future, I know what will be at the forefront of my mind: the amazing people who have inspired me to be a better person and more importantly, to be myself. And for that, I want to thank them. In an effort to be completely cliche, I´m going to quote my favorite song from my favorite musical, Wicked- "For Good."

I've heard it said

That people come into our lives for a reason, 

Bringing something we must learn and we are led to those

Who help us most to grow if we let them

And we help them in return

Now I don't know if I believe that's true

But I know I'm who I am today because I knew you 

Like a comet pulled from orbit as it passes the sun
Like a stream that meets a boulder halfway through the wood
Who can say if I've been changed for the better
But because I knew you, I have been changed for good

It well may be that we will never meet again in this lifetime

So let me say before we part

So much of me is what I have learned from you

You'll be with me, like a handprint on my heart

Now whatever way our stories end

I know you have rewritten mine by being my friend

The final topic I want to talk about is my family. Everyone has heard the saying that distance makes the heart grow fonder, and again, I apologize for being cliche. But I completely believe that is true. Not only does distance make you fonder of someone, but also more appreciative of the relationships you have that will never fade. Family is just that; relationships that will never fade. They are the only ones who I know will love me no matter what and support me through whatever decisions I make; that kind of unconditional love was very crucial while I was here. Furthermore, I recently heard from my dad through an e-mail about how proud he was of his three daughters and how my mom and him, even though at some times may have doubted themselves (only because I was such a little brat), had done a decent job in raising us. Well I wanted to confirm that, whole heartedly. Being in Europe, being able to live here for a semester and experience all these different cultures, is such an immense opportunity. I would like to credit my family for this, not only because they pushed me to succeed academically, but I believe they gave me the tools as a person to succeed in any situation. If I wasn´t raised to take risks and work hard for things, I probably would not have even dreamed of studying abroad. But my parents and many other family members made this a possibility for me. For this, among many other things, I am eternally grateful.

Thank you for taking the time to read this, friends. I wanted to show how I really felt about my time here and I am happy that you decided to read this.